


White Lands of Empathy

by Madam_Violet



Series: The Vault Chronicles [28]
Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Gen, Missy is kinda cute, The Vault (Doctor Who), another Nightwish inspired title
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-05
Updated: 2018-07-05
Packaged: 2019-06-05 20:58:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,733
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15179255
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Madam_Violet/pseuds/Madam_Violet
Summary: When Missy isn't sure she understands something, she asks the Doctor. That's part of engaging in the process, after all.





	White Lands of Empathy

When the Doctor entered the Vault after a week of conferences aboard, he felt a bit worried about Missy's state. However, it wasn't as bad as he had dreaded. Missy was sitting on her bed, busy cutting little paper Daleks to add on her miniature re-enactment of the battle of Arcadia. Despite the creepiness of her current project, she looked quite well. He looked at her a moment, a smile playing on his lips as he waited for her to notice his presence. When she finally did, she jumped from the bed, sending all the Daleks and War TARDISes billowing away.  
“You're back !” she cried with a bit too much enthusiasm, before switching awkwardly to her usual smugness. “Not that I missed you that much.”  
The Doctor laughed softly and pecked a kiss on her forehead.  
“Nice little battlefield on your bed.”  
“Thanks, would you like to play with me ? I can even let you play the Time Lords for the first round !”  
“Sure, you explain the rules ?”  
Missy patted a spot on the bed and the Doctor joined her.  
“I'm adding a few action cards first. Playing with the egg is one thing, but for you I need to create a bit more challenge.”  
She took a piece of sturdy paper and a pen, turning her back to the Doctor, so he couldn't see what she was doing.  
“You've been playing with Nardole ?”  
“Yeah, a girl has to lower her standards when time is hard.”  
“Don't be like this, he's great with you.”  
Missy turned around and bit her lip sheepishly.  
“I was wondering, as you want me to engage in the process, maybe I could ask you about a couple of things. Not that I don't understand them, but it's more like I'm not sure about the point of them.”  
The Doctor nodded, putting a delicate Time Lord figure back into the council room.  
“Sure, what are you unsure about ?”  
“I don't really get why the egg is so nice with me.”  
“Why would he need reasons, he's a good man, that's all.”  
“So he's nice without a reason ?” she said with a snort. “How dumb, did you forgot a few neuronal connections when you rebuilt him up ?”  
“Don't be like this, it's your attitude that's dumb.”  
“Hey, meanie !”  
She threw a Dalek card at the Doctor's head; He grabbed it and snorted in a perfect imitation of Missy.  
“Time Weapon, really ? I just have to reverse the polarity and there goes the Dalek ship !”  
“I meant, no one is nice without a reason. Only goodies-too-shoes believe this, and it's because they bury their heads high up in their arses. I was thinking better of him, to be honest.”  
The Doctor smiled broadly and Missy bit her cheeks in regret.  
“That doesn't mean I like him or whatever. I just know better than you about your so called perfect friends ! Seriously, what does he want ? Its getting on my nerves !”  
“Maybe he just wants you to be happy. It's his job to take care of you, after all.”  
“So he's nice because you ordered him to. Makes sense to me...”  
“Not only, he's nice because he's a decent human being.”  
“Please, stop embarrassing yourself. The only reasons why he's nice to me is either because he wants something of me, or because he's scared of me. I don't really see what I could give him in an immediate future, and if he did want something he would work for my escape. So the only sensible option is that he's scared of me. Not a big deal, any creature with half a brain would be scared of me.”  
The Doctor did his best not to burst in a fond laughter. She looked like a small kitten all puffed up and it was so hilarious and endearing at the same time.  
“I don't think he's scared of you, Missy. Well, he is, but that's not a reason to be nice, is it ?”  
“It can be.”  
“Yes, it could, but only if there were a power dynamic and you were in charge.”  
Missy glared at the Doctor.  
“Maybe there is. I could very much kill him if I wanted. Isn't it being in charge ?”  
“I think you're a bit over confident, but let's not make the test. You know very much how the dynamic works, Missy. Nardole is your caregiver and it's natural he cares for you.”  
“Another great speech about empathy ? You know it's the biggest illusion of the sentient world, my dear ?”  
“It's not. Empathy is what allowed humans, Time Lords, and so many other species in the wide universe to grow as society.”  
“You mean personal interest.”  
“I mean selfless love. Why do you think I'm so forgiving with you ?”  
“Because you need me and it's primal surviving instinct to protect one's specie when there's no one else around. Especially if it's a good-looking individual of the opposed sex.”  
“So you reduce our story to simple biology ? That's a bit disappointing.”  
“Don't be silly, we're Time Lords, not animals.”  
The Doctor smiled and took Missy's hand in his.  
“You see, there is more than personal interest.”  
“I'm not saying that. Keeping me here as a pet is still in your personal interest, don't say otherwise. And it's in my personal interest to stay, because it's a safe place and I'm lonely without you.”  
“Okay, each other's company is a form of self-interest. Maybe that the same for Nardole. He prefers when you feel well and it's in his interest to make sure you're not lacking of anything.”  
“Why would he prefer seeing me well ? As you said I have no power over him and he has all power over me. I don't get it !”  
This time, Missy's voice was edging towards a distressed whine. The confusion was far more disturbing for Missy than the Doctor had thought. It was a good thing, it meant she was questioning herself and the world to a new extent.  
“Does it worry you, not understanding ?”  
“Yes, a bit” Missy admitted. “Before I would have assumed he was scared of me, or he had a hidden agenda, but I've been here long enough to know it's not the case.”  
“And ?”  
“And I feel out of the loop. It's horrible feeling left behind ! I feel like an idiot !”  
“You're not. You're a very smart person asking question most people would never think about.”  
“Maybe they wouldn't because they already know the answer. Doctor, all my life I have been the clever clog, always a few miles ahead from every one, but now I feel trapped and definitely the loser of the game.”  
“You haven't lost anything because it's not a game. You're not here because you are a trophy to me. It's a bit a punishment, and mostly a protection. You are here for your own interest, Missy. To get a chance to grow as a person and have a better life. All I see now is that you are struggling with the very concept of empathy and it's good. It's very, very good. It means you are a very clever woman.”  
“How not understanding makes me clever ?”  
“Because an idiot wouldn't even know they lack of understanding. Do you know why true psychopaths can't be helped ? It's because they don't care asking the good questions. They don't see any interest in anyone else point of view. But you know better, and even if you don't feel the same as Nardole and me, even if you think we're wrong, you still ask yourself why we think like we do.”  
Missy cocked her head like a curious feline and her eyes went wide when the Doctor threw his arm around her shoulders and wrapped her in a warm and cosy hug. She melted in it, burying her head in his neck.  
“I love you so much, Missy.”  
“I still don't get it.”  
“There's nothing to get. Empathy is just like a lower form of telepathy. Some people learn consciously or not how to block it, but most people don't and it's good. It has no real purpose, it can make you weaker, or stronger in some case. It can be a blessing like it can be a curse.”  
“You think I don't know what empathy is ? I understand people's actions and thoughts more than anyone, that's how I manipulate them.”  
“You understand but you don't feel. If you felt, you would suffer for every crime you committed, it would be endless hell. Believe me, it's how I feel most of the time and most of my actions were justified for the greatest good. But I still hurt so many people in my life. Making you happy is like a way to atone for it. It's selfish, in the end. Empathy is neither good nor bad, it's like everything else, it's all about the use.”  
“So you think I'm defective ?”  
Missy seemed a bit destabilised, like if the Doctor's words could make her doubt.  
“Maybe a bit. But it's okay. I know you can develop empathy, at your level. But it's okay if you don't. Contrary to what most people think, being a sociopath doesn't make you a bad person. I've met people with no feelings at all, people with no empathy, all sort of minds and I saw them struggling with concepts, using statistics and probabilities to make the right choices. They ask questions all the time, they make analogies with their own experiences. It's a tedious job most people with a commonly wired brain don't understand. And it's amazing. You can be one of those people, you can be amazing with little or no empathy. It can become your strength for good. Never think you are bad by nature, or defective, because I know this is wrong !”  
The Doctor smiled and Missy felt her hearts bubble. At that moment, the door opened, and they both turned around.  
“Sorry to... interrupt whatever you were doing.” Nardole stuttered.  
“No prob, Bob !” Missy chirped cheerfully. “Why don't you come in ? I was thinking adding a faction to my Time War board game. What about playing the human rebels !”  
Nardole frowned, surprised by the excitement in the Time Lady's voice. Those two probably had an encouraging discussion, may it not be another silly promise he would have to interfere with.  
“Oh, it seems fun. So we're ready for another week-long battle ?”


End file.
